I know that it just started but where is the talent? I feel that this is the laziest, safest, and most talentless group that Bravo has ever had to offer. Of course it has only been one episode but it should of been a fun one using grocery store goods. Instead it ending up being boring and agonizing to watch. I felt like 10 people should of been auf’d so that I wouldn’t have to see anymore of their butt ugly designs. Why the bitterness? I don’t know. I love this show. It is my guilty pleasure. I watch it and worship it and yes that embarrasses me but I don’t care. I love Tim Gunn, I wish he would narrate for my GPS. He is the most constructive and classiest human on the planet.

Anyways, I got sucked into the Bravo blackhole last night. Even as a mega fan, I forgot that the new season was beginning last night. I was flipping through the channels getting ready to watch some Netflix when I saw the sweet bear, Chris March of season 4. I love him. I wish that he would of won. Not because of his designs on the show which were either hit or miss, but because he is so nice. He is real person and not a bitch. He is an amazingly kitschy creative individual that should of won. But I keep forgetting that if you are the creative one then you won’t win. People want to see something that Macy’s or bluefly.com can sell. So why did Rami not win? I have no clue. His clothes were very female body friendly. Christian won because he is a little bitch with an ugly haircut. Sorry, I really did not like him. He came across as such an insecure small town hairdresser that had to fight ugly to cover up his new boy in town complex. He was not fierce.I’m happy that Chris and Rami are getting alot of work after the show.

Anyways, back to Season 5, I believe I do not like anybody. Blayne is a mega creep. First, I hate neon clothes and “urban” design. Hello Blayne, you’re from Yakima what and the hell do you know about hip-hop or urban design? I thought I could support anyone from Washington but I can’t. I really hate Blayne, I have a biological urge to pull his hair. I can’t explain it. What did he keep saying, “Babealiscious” or something. Eww. I find Suede obnoxious, that is if that is even his real name… I don’t think that Stella knows how to sew using a machine.  She should just go home and continue making clothes for Blondie, that’s more than any of us will do in a lifetime anyways. Jennifer is very boring. Emily dresses like a clown and looks like that one chick from Mad TV. Leanne is to insecure and gets on my last nerves. She is all sad because she is from Portland, OR and is trying to be NYC and feels sad. Well, as a lover of the Pacific Northwest, New York ain’t got nothin’ on us. We’re badass because we don’t give a shit. You’re still young Leanne, one day you’ll understand. Jerell seems like he is going to create some major drama later on. Jerry should be out with that creepy thrasher outfit. It wasn’t even sexy. It was dumpy serial killer. The other contestants compared it to American Physco but at least Mr. American Physco knew haute couture. Keith is too stuck up and thinks that he has a talent which I know I haven’t seen yet. Wesley is a dork and hopes that his dorky Marc Jacobs style will get him somewhere. I don’t hate them all yet. Daniel seems like the only one with real talent. I look forward to seeing his creations. Joe seems like the nice guy that won’t start shit. I mean he has daughters, how cute is that? Kelli is adorable and seems to have some sense. I don’t know anything about Kenley. Did you notice that they totally avoided her this first episode? I don’t think we saw any of her portfolio. All I know is that she is cute and we have the same hair. Korto is a very styl’n woman but I doubt she’ll make it through. I see alot of shapeless caftans and tunics in the future. Not that I wouldn’t wear them, I just know what Michael Kors will say. And then finally there’s Terri. She’s my true neutral. I could like her or hate her, I don’t know yet.

Sadly, I will keep watching religiously with a class of wine every Wed. night. I love to hate the show and I love to love the show. I just want Tim Gunn and Chris March to be best friends and for Rami to design my clothes. Oh and Santino designs Camel cigarette boxes. I don’t smoke but I still bought it because of him. I loved that childish insecure, talented nut case.