I’m usually not one for Disney crap. I mean I really didn’t like any of their features and many of the story lines were so sexist and racist that as a child I knew something was just “wrong” with them and I stayed the hell away. They lost my attention very quickly. However, I did like Alice in Wonderland but who doesn’t? For some reason I kind of liked the Aristocats. The tunes were catchy. Who could love the band of hipster pot head beatnik alley cats and their ambiguously “Asian” Siamese, cross-eyed buck teeth friend/opium dealer? There is nothing racist or well, inappropriate about that is there? The story line is so lame. Super mega, posh lesbian cat lady has nobody to will her amazing estate too, so the “evil” man in the story dumps the cats. And who could blame him? He works a hard service industry job, wiping the ass or some old socialite and taking her stupid Belle Epoque class/society bitch abuse, being all loyal and stuff, for her to give her fortune to pedigree cats. Class battle between man and cats… Beautiful single hot mamma cat and her three brats are left to fend for themselves like every other cat. She meets with a tom cat who would totally have had the feline AIDS and has been around the block a few hundred times. He doesn’t want a ready made family (like he doesn’t have a few hundred kids out there somewhere), he wants to run but money talks. He’s like a hooker with a heart of gold and falls for mamma anyways. And seriously what economically poor guy wouldn’t fall for a hot, rich lady even if she had kids? Come on. Happily ever after. I’m sure he moved in to the mansion, got his shots and got neutered. Party is over, Mr. Thomas O’Mally, the alley cat.

Anyways, enough of my ranting about how much I hate Disney. I only kind of like their older stuff because it shows what racist crap was in the media and I love to see the company make excuses for their behavior. It’s a lesson in history to look back and see how stupid everybody used to be.

Anyways again, back to this limited edition lip treatment. The packaging features sweet, proper, and cute Marie, Disney’s feline Paris Hilton. The packaging is a bit lame, but the product is nice. It is rich and has a sweet pink sheen and smells of orange blossoms. Some of my favorite “flavorings” in nice balms. It’s nice and girly and fairly simple and it is only $18 from beautyhabit.com.

Don't use my credit card at Sephora!

I read that Too Faced was thinking about making a Smurf makeup collection not too long ago. I was really hoping they wouldn’t go there. I’m not much of one for these cross-over product gimmicks. I mean the Smurfs have always kind of creeped me out. There’s like one girl in the entire village and she comes across as a slut. Plus, I didn’t really understand it watching it as a child and I felt bad for the kitty cat. I didn’t know why they were so mean to that ruff looking kitty. And there was that one mentally retarded smurf that everyone was mean too, and they had an odd language/idiolect. However, they live in mushrooms. Being a mushroom hunter I do think that is pretty cool. But, I know that they only lived in mushrooms because only drug heads and little hippie children watched the show.

This Smurfette Signature Collection contains the following products:

FACE: There is a So Smurfy Illumination Face Powder which is a blend of complexion enhancing color-correcting shades in a smurf paper compact. I have to admit that this is kind of cute. I am a sucker for powders as art. I mainly purchase them and look at them and well, never use them.

EYES: There are two new shades of Smurfy-Eyed Liquid Eyeliner in Feel’n Smurfy which is a multi-colored glitter and Smurf You which is a bright blue which I love. The top has Miss Smurfette on top, looking bashful as always. There is a So Smurfy Eye Shadow Quad. It has two beautiful taupey brown shimmers, shimmery pink, and a shimmery blue. It is also in that smurf packaging.

LIPS: There is a Mood Swing Emotionally Activated Lip Gloss in a Smurf packaging. This is supposed to work with your “body” heat and swing from a blue shimmer to a pink. I never try these because I am scared that it will “swing” too much and if I was mad at somebody they would know because my lips would turn cobalt blue or something. Silly, I know. I am sure this stuff just turns pink on everybody.

I don’t think I am going to “go there” and purchase any of these items. There aren’t many cartoons I would endorse on cosmetics, just Jem, really. I am a fan of Smurf blue and if there was a liquid liner truly in that shade I would “go” for it.